Too Big, Too Small, Too Illegal

That one was too big. And this one is too small. I just need the right one.

But Hubs, this is the end of the car-go-round, I promise.

After several years of driving an Acura sedan, I bought a Honda Pilot. But I couldn’t park the Pilot. It was too big. I felt like I was driving the short bus around town -only it was empty. I don’t have little kids. My kids have their own cars. And unfortunately, it took me seven months of driving the Pilot, to decide I didn’t like it.

And so I bought a Prius. And it was cool. For about five minutes. Until everyone tried to run me off the road; or assumed I was a tree-hugger. Okay, so I like trees. But apparently a Prius also screams Liberal. I’ve been flipped off by an old-timer with an “Obama Sucks” sign duct taped to his Harley windshield, while we were stopped at a stop light. And I am not a Liberal! I like guns, oil, rich people, the Bill of Rights, the Constitution, budgets and I think women should be feminine (whoa!). But, I am a crappy conservative too; I like gay people, bodily-choices, organic foods, whales and old people. So besides making a huge unintended political statement with my car, my Prius feels unsafe. The doors are hollow and make a tinny sound when they shut. And people speed up to get in front of me because they automatically think I’m slow -it’s like a Priustigmata.

Somehow, fifty-two miles per gallon really doesn’t matter when you have to maintain a death grip on the steering wheel.

So I’ve come full circle. I have decided to buy another Acura. I want to blend. And be safe. You know, so I can release my hands from the death grip I have on the steering wheel, and text while driving -before it’s illegal.


2 comments on “Too Big, Too Small, Too Illegal

  1. knr1851
    February 10, 2013 at February 10, 2013 #

    Just talked me out of ever owning a Prius!

    • virtualendings
      February 10, 2013 at February 10, 2013 #

      Yeah, it’s sad. But true. It was a great car; and not slow at all. But as of today, I’m back in an Acura.

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