Why Don’t We Get Drunk & Make A Screwy List

Who the hell came up with the “Traditional Anniversary Gift” list? And was it during the Depression? Paper, cotton, fruit, sugar, tin? Really? Even Laura Ingalls had paper in her house, and sugar in her pantry.

And the “Modern” list isn’t much better: clocks, desk sets, fashion jewelry, sterling silver, seriously? Who decides this crap? “Oh yes Hunny, please buy me a new set for my desk!” If I said that, my husband would look at me and ask me if it hurt when the Pod People took over. And sterling silver, or fashion jewelry? Uh-huh. Actually, I think I want a clock. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

So, I just learned we got married on National Margarita Day (and I’m completely ignoring the part about the margarita not even being an American drink) and I wondered why there isn’t an….”Anniversary Booze List.”

1st: BEER
2nd: WINE
3rd: VERMOUTH
4th: VODKA
5th: RUM
6th: WHISKEY
7th: TEQUILA
8th: BOURBON
9th: EVERCLEAR
10th & beyond: ABSINTHE, GRAIN ALCOHOL (or whatever you can get)

Notice the trend… As you rack up the years of wedded bliss, the alcohol gets stronger. And for added fun, you could have a drink, or shot, per year of matrimony. It makes perfect sense.

And on February 22nd it’s a Happy National Margarita Day to my sweet Hubs!

(And let’s have 8 shots of bourbon Hunny, because we’ve moved way beyond tequila. )

20130207-205510.jpg

Advertisements
%d bloggers like this: