with this ring… you won’t get carded

Winn Dixie Cashier to my husband: Sir, I need to see your I.D.

Hubs: Huh?

WD Cashier (giggling and making eyes at my husband): We have to card anyone who looks like they are under thirty.

I roll my eyes. Hubs steps between me and the cashier.

HELLO? I AM STANDING RIGHT HERE! HE HAS A KID THAT IS CLOSER TO THIRTY THAN HE IS! THIS MAN PASSED THIRTY BEFORE AL GORE INVENTED THE INTERNET! ARE YOU F&%KING BAT-$HIT BLIND?

Hubs ignores my silent screaming rant, and grins. Then he cheerfully produces his identification.

As we walk to the car I say to Hubs…

You need to start wearing a wedding band.

“Why? You don’t wear one.”

I wear mine most of the time, but I lost a hundred pounds and my ring falls off, so I have a valid reason. If you lost a hundred pounds I wouldn’t make you wear a too-big wedding band.

“I don’t even HAVE a wedding band!”

I just said we were going to get you one.

“If I lost a hundred pounds I would look like I had AIDs.”

Exactly.

Advertisements

2 comments on “with this ring… you won’t get carded

  1. Vicki
    June 16, 2014 at June 16, 2014 #

    Congrats on losing 100 pounds!

    • virtualendings
      June 16, 2014 at June 16, 2014 #

      Thanks Vicki! My weight loss journey was/is such a long process (4+ years and counting) that I didn’t realize until about six months ago that all the weight I lost added up to a hundred pounds. I lost the bulk of it a couple of years ago and I just never thought to tally up the last few pounds… so yeah. Wow. It’s a hundred. Mind = blown.

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: