Tag: wives

itsy-bitsy-lonely

“Look what I just killed in our garage.” My husband just walked in the kitchen and proudly showed me a picture on his phone. Are you kidding me? That’s a black widow! “Yep. And I killed it.” What about her friends and her nest of eggs? Should we call an exterminator! (laughing) “It was just

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just. like. that.

I saw this infogram on Facebook a few minutes ago and I was shocked. Horrified. Worried. Hubs and I LOVE to read, our boys are all avid readers (even as adults), and we all LOVE bookstores; in fact, new books were treats for our kids when they were little. How could somebody not love to

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i think i know you

I met my new doctor today. Well, she’s not really a doctor, she’s a nurse with super powers, which is cool with me. I’m fine with her power, I just worried if I’d like her; if we’d click; if she’d get me, or if she’d think I was crazy. My old-man doctor of ten years

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Pretty Naked Piggies

I’ve been logging long miles training for my third half marathon in a couple of months, and I read online that an Epsom Salts bath is good for sore muscles, and that it will also detoxify your body. So the other night I decided to try it. Since I don’t normally take tub baths I

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Stop Bugging Me

Hubs is reaching to pick up his iPhone and I remember… “HUBS! DON’T TOUCH YOUR PHONE! You need to clean it first.” Uh. Why? “Because I used it to kill a bug.” You used my phone to kill a bug? “Yep.” (Hubs is staring at me in disbelief) “Really. I did. Look at the back.

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An E-Card for Hubs

Happy Birthday Hubs. I’m super glad you were born, and I met you, and that we have a son just like you. I’m thrilled that we get to play house 24/7, that you are my best friend, and that you almost always let me have my way. You are the most generous, patient, kind, smart,

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You’ll Be Fine Cupcake

“HUUBBBSS! Wake up! Wake Up!” Whaaaaa? What time is it? Huh? We don’t have to be up for another hour… Whaaa WHY are YOU up? What’s wrong? Are you sick? “No I’m not sick! I’m COLD! I can’t sleep because it’s freezing in here! You left the sliding door open last night and it feels

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She’s Lettin’ It All Hang Out

Whenever I hear certain songs, my body automatically dances and my mouth sings. I can’t help it. It’s one of those involuntary things. Like sneezing. Or the hiccups. I automatically belt out the lyrics, or my own version of made-up-but-sounds-like-the-words lyrics. Even if I’m in my car. Driving. Sounds normal, right? We all do it.

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Your Choice: Complimentary Beach Towel or Lifetime Supply of Lighter Fluid?

Tonight I learned shopping is an activity I should avoid when I’m high on codeine cough syrup. But I needed a few things. And I had to stop the cough. If I didn’t stop coughing, I was going to projectile vomit one my lungs, right through my bronchial tubes. And right now, my bronchial tubes

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Debbie Said To Hide The Syrup, Not The 30 Year Old Secret

I have bronchitis. Which means to keep from coughing up a lung, I have to take prescription syrup for my cough, that I had to sign for; and show my driver’s license for; and then listen to the twenty-year-old pharmacy cashier, Debbie, with four-hundred tattoos, and fifty-eleven facial piercings, lecture me; on how I needed

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